Mona is a senior manager at the retail bank’s main city branch. Along with a handsome salary, she is equally generous with her spending, be it on her close loved ones or for causes she supports.

Her generosity has not put her into debt, but she has also not been able to save enough to be considered savings.

During one of her office retreats toward the end of the event, she was approached by a team from another function that was raising funds for a cause she had always supported. She made a huge donation, and later, when the same team was paired with her on a critical project, she found herself a bit authoritative and expecting things to go her way.

The tension escalated in direct proportion to her assertiveness, eventually culminating in a major conflict.

Mona was deeply resentful of what transpired.

This did not remain confined to work; her bitterness, born of resentment, was showing up with friends, colleagues, and, most often, with herself. She ruminated and overthought constantly and felt miserable despite her generosity.

During our work, she found it very difficult to come to terms with her resentment because this is not who she thought she was.

Holding a mirror for her was one of the trickiest and most complex assignments I had to work on so that she feels less defensive and more aware.

I designed the coaching assignment for Mona to help her grasp how, when we lack intention and give capriciously, our giving turns resentful.

And the emotion of resentment then spreads across to the self and to all others. If Intention is the compass, deep self-reflection is the tool, and a combination of both saves you from vacillating between extremes on a spectrum, from being an over-giver to a cold, distant, oblivious soul.

Resentment is usually the feeling before burnout and emotional exhaustion set in.

Resentfulness as a feeling has a lot of power, which can change you into a human with bottled-up emotions about to burst anytime, and if that does not happen, then the physical body is keeping the score for later years in an inevitable form of mental and physical illnesses.

You may not be playing extremes like Mona, but if you also feel resentful despite your generosity and are often left feeling bitter by the variance between your giving and receiving, I invite you to the Journey of Self, a coaching program where you are an unapologetic you, at ease in your skin. At the driver’s seat of your Life.

We start with a discovery call. To book your session, click here.

Warmly,

Mehnaz Amjad.

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