During one of the busiest periods of a project, I had a job opportunity from one of the top tech giants in the world, anyone in my place would have jumped to grab the offer.
But for me my “Self-Doubt ” would take the decisions
So, I decided to go slow, I attended the interview and then a series of phone interviews with only one intent to learn how this top tech giant conduct interviews, as if I knew beforehand, I would never make it and will treat this as an experience to learn.
What I didn’t realize at that given point in time that my “Self-Doubt {Imposter Syndrome} gave rise to negative self-talk which in eventually never made me believe that I deserve it and that the firm searched for my profile based on my excellent work and reviews both in the present organization and also of the past.
Under the “Self-Doubt” & negative self-talk syndrome I told myself I will never make it and it’s just a learning experience.
What we strongly believe, mirrors back and the more I intended the more it mirrored back as I intended.
I eventually could not make it to the offer phase and was politely informed of it through a well written empathetic rejection letter.
I felt deeply sad, and disappointed, but I consoled myself stating yes, I knew this was to happen.
Several months later, when one of my colleagues took a job in the same firm at a very higher position.
As I learnt about it – I realized ;
- What an opportunity I had lost ,
- all because of my lack of ability to believe in me,
- giving in to the mind chatter of —What if’s”
- the I’m not good enough kept me stuck in a job and role, while my colleague who was few years younger in experience and age, went on to become the youngest leader at a coveted position in the same firm.
- While I stayed stuck with my trivial “what if”, “will it happen”, I don’t think I can make it inner chatter.
Having read this ,
If any or most of what you read resonated with you, I want you to pause now and take 3 deep breaths and recall from your past
Are there any opportunities you are hesitant to say “YES” to in your workspace? , just because like me you are ALSO caught up in an inner chatter of
—“I don’t think so,
—What if’s,
—I’m not good enough
If that’s the case, I urge you to write your experience and deeply reflect so that you find what’s really holding you back.
And if you need more assistance and support on it, you can connect with me here.
© Mehnaz Amjad 2017-2025
Mehnaz Amjad | Coach
Hyderabad, India
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